Vacation

I need a vacation and it means:

1. no balik kampung
2. no rumah kakak2 or ipar duai
3. no rumah kengkawan.

What if..

Nothing that really 'happening' happens today,it's just like yesterday and the other day.I listens to 'rakyat songs' repeatedly, and my heart feels happy.I have so many things to do but I don't know where and how to start.

I have only 2 more semesters before I go back to work. I am afraid. What if I don't get what I want to get? How should I answer to those 'perli-ing' questions?? I really don't know.

And if I get what I want to get, am I getting arrogant? Put on make up,wear a designer handbags ,clothes, shoes, going around and ask people to call me 'DR ZUE"(mmm..It sounds good..hehehhe). No,I don't want to be like that.

I want to be a good wife to my husband, lovely daughter to my parent, loving mother to Iman,dedicated student to my SV, good companion to my friends and many more..but, I can't get all I want. That's the rule of nature. If that's the case, pls tell me, why I feel like this??

Flight delay

My plan for today went wrong because Mr Technician was on leave,so the flight will be delay. It's okay, we always have a plan but The Almighty is the one who decide.He knows what's the best. Maybe the air is turbulent today, hence the airplane will quickly stall, who knows? Better safe than sorry. What is my plan B????

Writing a report.

This is my weak part or maybe 'procrastination' is the best word to describe my current attitude. Hehehehe..My husband always insist me to start writing a report because in the future, it will be easy for me to write a thesis. "Ya Allah..berikan lah aku kerajinan"..

Stressed

Yes, I want to break everything around me now!!!

I try hard not to cry, but I couldn't. The tears rapidly flows from my eyes, I can't take it anymore!!

Today and Yesterday

When I was young and single, time and money is not a problem. I can go everywhere and buy anything that I want. The story is not the same after I get married. Everything I do and every cent I spend, I have to think twice, or maybe thrice.I have to consider many things. For example, I need to buy a new perfume, which the last bottle that I bought during my wedding day last year is going to finish in no time from now. But when I checked the balance of my money in a bank account, minus here and there, there is impossible for me to spend for a liquid which cost over RM200++. So, unchecked the perfume in the 'must buy' list for a while. Hu3,life suck isn't it?

Then,as I am getting older and married, most of my time and money is for my family. My husband and I is not a rich and famous person. We lead a simple life as long as we are happy and out of debts. Our priority is our daughter,Iman Najibah. Her future life in term of education and money is what we were looking and taking care from now. In case we were no longer here, we want to make sure,her safety,education and financial is all guaranteed.So,our money spending every months must not exceed from what we are planning. If only we have an extra money, then we can go shopping and holiday.Otherwise, home sweet home:) I never regret of this life,in fact I am happy because, all of this difficulties teach me how to manage money wisely.

Contraception

I took a hormone injection for birth control every 3 months.I don't want to use hormone shot anymore because I can't take the side effects (change in periods, dry vagina hence pain during intercourse, depression and weight gain).So last nite, I sent sms to my friends asked what was their method to prevent pregnancy. Most of them are using a biological control, none of them are using pill, patch, condom, IUD, etc. So all night long, I keep thinking about this issue. At first I told my husband that I want to stop the hormonal shot, let us do a biological method, and he agreed. Next, when I was thinking about the pain during delivery and how fragile I am now to handle 2 kids when I am doing my Phd work, I changed my mind. I have to take a prevention.

This morning, my husband and I went to clinic. After a long discussion, the doctor suggested me to take a pill, Yasmin. Hopefully it is the best for me. Oh and she also asked me to do a Pap Smear, and I did!! This was the second time I did this procedure. Tak sukeeeee!!!

Selamat Pengantin Baru Isma

She's been a good friend of mine when we were in Uitm Penang. She is beautiful, sweet and soft spoken lady. After finished her contract with UiTM, she works in JKR and since then, we lost contact. Last two weeks, she sent me an invitation card. Alhamdulillah, finally she found her Mr.Right." Selamat Pengantin Baru Isma, moga kekal hingga ke syurga"..amin